Here’s the thing. Today, I was planning on writing a very sappy entry. For the past few weeks, I’ve been mulling in my head a few entries and planning a special one for today. I’ve jotted a few down on paper and my sticky note on my laptop is filled with stuff that I plan on saying.
Heck, I knew what I wanted to write about – I wanted to write an entry today, dedicated to my husband of six months. I wanted to try and attempt a non-sappy entry on what is an essentially sappy occasion. I wanted to share with everyone who reads my blog (all five of you and dwindling) about today.
Today, is something I had been looking forward to for ages. Ever since the day I got married, I had been looking forward to it. Not because I’m some crazy hag who feels the need to mark her relationship at every second (“Oooh! Darling! It’s been 132 days since we got married! Let’s celebrate!”) but because there is something perennially special with the words: 6 months. 6 month is half a year. It’s halfway to one year. It’s like almost a year!
It’s a milestone that suggests, ‘Wahey! We’ve made it.’ Even a month (on the 5 month mark) before we hit the 6 month mark, I’ve already made plans to celebrate this incredible milestone (incredible despite that there have been billions of people who have done the same – but I think it’s incredible, because it’s US TWO, us crazy people, we managed to stay together!) by a sappy entry, going away somewhere and then having a lovely dinner out.
I think some people would be quite upset if they reach any mark, like an anniversary, or a monthiversary and had nothing, especially if they’ve built it up in their heads for ages. The thing I’ve learnt is, since I’ve gotten married is, well, nothing goes to plan! Like I certainly did not plan on being sick again – (5th time this year) – and lying down in bed, re-writing this blog entry over and over again, because it’s hard to write when your head is somewhere else and your body is somewhere else.
But I’m not lying when I say, I really don’t mind.
I know it sounds terribly clichéd and smug when I say, I don’t mind not having a chance to celebrate out and do something special with Eizwan is because the past six months have been incredibly special.
It’s not to say it’s been an easy six months, it’s been a hell of a rollercoaster ride, filled with ups and downs. Everyone had warned me, married life would be difficult but it was only one other person who said to me, “It’s going to be so much fun, starting a new life together and setting up a home together” And you know what? That person was right.
The hard part – well, everyone can tell you the hard part. A chunk of the luxuries both Eizwan and I had been used to had to be cut out. Astro, what Astro? We counted pennies, we argued on what’s right to spend on, what’s wrong to spend on. It takes time to get used to each other, and in some ways, I feel like I’m getting to know an entirely different person.
On the other hand, and I wish someone had told me this, the best part about getting married, is gaining this new partner-in-crime who thinks the same way you do and who wants to do just as many crazy shit. Eizwan knows when I have a crazy idea up my sleeve – and boy, we’ve done some nutty things. The best part of being married and being an adult? No one to tell you that you can’t do it.
So what if I’m going to salvage a 30 year old ice-cream machine on a Thursday night, before hunting down ice and salt and making ice cream at around 11pm?
So what if cleaning the house at midnight seems like a good idea?
So what if we attempted to make cheese with curdled yogurt? (No one dared to eat it, except me and Eizwan. And we’re fine!)
And then spending our honeymoon like it was Amazing Race Asia edition?
Throwing a bimbap party as part of our mini-house warming?
Five-hour Law and Order marathons?
Hmm…they all seem to be related to food. But aside from the ‘nuttier’ things, there were just so many small things that happened between us that, I dunno how to describe it, just so much fun. It’s a bit like my declared competition on who could fill up our respective bookshelves first. What started as a genuine need to fill up our bookshelves on the living room, turned into a competition where both resorted to stealing books from the other side to fill up their own bookshelves. I won by the way.
And it’s more than just having someone with you, who is willing to go about with your mad ideas. It’s being with someone who can listen to your insecurities and then say in a calm voice, ‘Lin, don’t be silly. There are no such things as aliens.’ Or something like that. Eizwan knows when to encourage my ridiculous-ness (“Yes, darling, you can go ahead and spend RM 14 for a box of kosher salt, just because Asian Food Channel said so,”) to appropriately discouraging my insanity: “No, Lin. Eating cookies for dinner is unacceptable. ”)
And Eizwan is my ever-willing partner to listen to my long rants and raves about politics, movies and intellectualism.
I could go on. And you could close the window and stop reading. But I won’t go on because I’ve reached my end-limit. I’ve already corrected every single typo I could think of but probably missed out a ton more because I’m in some lala land where my brain is watching ponies dance with teddy bears.
We’d probably be spending our “special dinner” tonight by ordering in – which is a good thing; no one wants to dine with a patron who sounds like her lungs are trying to escape through her lips. But I honestly can say, it does not matter. It sounds like I’m trying to justify myself but no – the best thing about the past 6 months, had not been the material wealth, or the stuff, or things, or holidays (which there are none). A lot of people make marriage life out to be about material wealth, from what you give on your hantaran, to where you spent your honeymoon, to who designed your dress, to whether you bought a house or not, to the cars you have. To discount them would be dishonest, material things had made my life comfortable, no doubt. But a chunk of my happiness has been based on the time I’ve spent with Eizwan, the time getting to know him, the time spending and doing crazy things, and the time feeling like I’m a better person, just by being with him.
I love you Eizwan, and happy six months – and looking to many more months ahead.