So…you work from home, huh?

I work from home. A lot of people think it’s the best thing in the world. I suppose in their head, they imagine that it’d be the most awesome thing evar. Whereby I sit down at my desk (or on my bed), with my laptop and my pyjamas, whilst I have a cocktail. I’d take a nap when I want to, go shopping when I want to. And then leisurely get up to finish my work.

I have to say that…it’s mostly true.

There are tremendous perks working from home. Like for instance, you can wear shorts and it doesn’t matter if you’ve not shaved your legs. Or you can have afternoon naps and sleep for a good two hours before getting up to continue on work. My personal favourite is standing outside the door and mocking and laughing those who are struggling to get through the traffic.

Hmmm. Shouldn’t say that or karma might blast into something terribly unexpected like a massive jam when you need to pee or something.

One of my biggest concerns when I got married was that Eizwan would not understand my schedules of someone who worked from home. Sure I would log off in the afternoon and sleep. Sure I would crawl out of bed late on the mornings he has to wake up early to make his morning commute. The privilege comes with a price – especially when it comes to deadlines and payment.

I think Eizwan struggles to understand my day, and to some extent, is envious of the flexibility that I have. Sure when things get too tiring, I pick up a wiggly cat and torment it to amuse myself. When I feel like an ice-cream during the day, I get one whenever  (Okay now I’m just bragging). When I feel like going out – I go out (but…despite the freedom bestowed on me, I almost never do it) and when my sister wants me to meet up for lunch, we meet.

(And now for the reality)

The hard part is the in between payments of course. I miss a regular income. There are days when I agonize if going back to work would be easier than counting pennies or battling private clinics to give you the medication that you want. It would be so much easier to just buy the medicine off-the counter.

I’m terribly careful with money, especially in our case, we have one salary to get by till I get paid in lump sum. And then we party like there’s no tomorrow and then we go back to our meager subsistence living.

Well, no, not really.

The other thing is discipline. It is very hard to be disciplined when you’re working on your own. Some days I can have everything planned in front of me. Like the coffee is ready. There is soft, non-distracting music in the background. The lights are switched on, and I have two fans on me to keep me cool. And I have all my papers by my side. And the phone in case any clients call….

That’s about the time when I’ll drift away onto lala land and watch recipes online. There’s this saying, that goes something like, with the internet, you can never create great fiction.

It goes without saying, with internet, you can’t do anything really. But to switch it off, it’s really, really, really hard. When you’re working at home alone, it’s a lovely way to stay connected with everyone. Despite my best attempts at training my cats to talk, they just stare at me blankly and respond with a meow. I suppose it’s still an improvement to my mother’s cats who walk away mid-conversation. Now that’s just rude.

But anyway. Discipline. The thing I need most right now. It’s August 3rd. I have a huge deadline by the first week of September – self-imposed of course. Eid is coming up, and I have to get my, off-and-on novel completed. It’s an impossible task that I’m setting for myself. But there’s a reason for it.

….

And this is the part where I don’t tell you the reason. Because if I do, then I’d have nothing to blog about. My life is not that interesting. Well, actually, it is but it is out of respect to my clients, I do not share. So stay tuned on the psychotic, one month effort. This month is going to be crazy.

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