I’m a Sea of Meringue under the Malaysian Sun

As some of you may know, or now you know, as of late I’ve been fretting a lot about wedding photographers. It’s not as though there aren’t any, but daaayng, yo! Wedding photographers are expensive! Like ridiculously expensive!

It’s not without a heavy heart that I have to find and pay for a photographer. Actually, with this wedding, it’s not without a heavy heart that I’m doing everything related to the wedding. Have you seen how much it costs lately to get married? Some people dream about throwing a gorgeous wedding at a hotel. I did the calculations for that and very nearly started convulsing. There is no way in hell I would let my parents spend RM 70k for one evening. It. Just. Maketh. No. Sense.

But anyway, back to the topic at hand. Photographers. They are expensive and there is pressure all around to do an outdoor photoshoot or in Malaysian vocabulary, the ever ubiquitous pre-wedding. There are many reasons why I don’t like the idea of a pre-wedding photographs, one of them romantic and the rest, because I’m me, I like to mock. Let’s get the romantic one out of the way.

Reason 1

In a small voice: I don’t like pre-wedding shoots  as  I don’t believe in getting into a wedding dress before the real day itself. Altogether now, lemme here the collective “Awww”. But seriously though, the white gown (or red or blue or green, whichever floats your boat) is intended for that day and that day only. If you’re going to wear it at every other occasion, well, what makes it special then?

Reason 2

It’s hard to do a pre-wedding shoot without well, looking a wee bit stupid. I have an allergy to looking stupid since I do it frequently enough on a daily basis. Like for instance:

Case 1:

Sheila was jogging in Taman Tun, the perennial favourite for exercise buffs and future brides and grooms to pose.

“So I’m running right, this one morning and I see this bride in her meringue dress and the tiara and the veil posing in front of me. And I thought, ‘very nice’. And I run a bit more and I see the same bride in front of me, doing another pose! And I’m like, maaaan, I’m going real slow today, this chick  in her wedding dress is ahead of me. I run a bit further and there she was again, like some sort of phantom. Daaamn!. So I pick the pace and it’s a workout but I wanted to see if the bride with lightning feet caught up with me.  But this time, I kept my eyes peeled. You know what I realized? They are three different girls. Same day. Same poses.”

Wayyyy to feel special for your wedding photos. Three couples. Same location in Taman Tun, under the hot Malaysian sun, with the photographs trying his best to trick the viewer into thinking we’re not in Malaysia.

Case 2:

SW relates the story seriously. But that’s just the way she rocks man. Seriously.

“So, my boss goes to FRIM (Forest Reserve) to do his photos. So here he was, in his suit with his beautiful bride when a group of scouts who were camping descended upon them en masse. Pointing. Staring.”

Possibly laughing. No. I can’t do it. I’ll look at the photos and not remember sweet memories of the day. I’ll remember the little boys in uniforms probably promising themselves that when they grow up, they’re not going grow up and be as ridiculous as the adults they saw that day.

Haha. Little do they know.

And finally, from my own experience.

Case 3:

It was a rainy, drizzly grey day in Singapore. Certainly not fun for going out . And certainly not fun AT ALL if you’re a bride taking pre-wedding photos. You have a crazy photographer who insists on doing artistique shots by the bus.

“Now, wait for it! Wait for it! Ah yes, POSE! PRETEND YOU’RE WAITING FOR THE BUS!”

But the thing is, you’re not waiting for the bus. Everyone else is. You’re trying to pose and be happy, but it just ain’t working. And combined with the open oggling of passerbys, are the irritated glances of people waiting for the bus and having to wade through a sea of meringue to get to their bus. Plus it’s wet. There’s muck on the hem of your dress.

And there’s that Malaysian chick who keeps pretending not to stare at you. It’s your day, who cares what they think. I mean you know, it’s not like she’s going to blog about it. Or repeat the story over and over to various friends. Because she’s a nice girl…right?

So there you have it. My reasons. The gown is sacred. Keep it for that day, don’t associate the gown with kids at camp, a jogger who runs around the track like a madman or a wet, rainy day in Singapore.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s