It is 9:35am and my cat Miki is looking to jump onto my table with great trepidation. It could possibly because that it has quickly deteriorated into a mess since I last tidied up (which would be oh, three weeks ago). Or it could be it’s because he’s quite fat and there’s always this possibility that he’ll jump and fall spectacularly to the mess on the floor. So he’s taken to sleeping on my bed, next to Sammy, my other cat who is stretched out.
The lovely thing about working from home of course, is having your cats distract you when you try to work.
I am super, super busy. I have a few million projects in my plate, and few million others that I’ve not even dared to look at. It ranges from Nano, two projects going on simultaneously and possibly planning for three other projects that some of my friends have expressed interest in doing (business and arts at the same time). So when I feel overwhelmed by the number of things to do, I open my blog up, write a few nonsensical paragraphs and then read the Guardian. When in doubt, procrastinate.
Recently, I’ve noticed that a few of my friends have been involved in some sort of political activism, one way or the other and they are angry. There are a lot of angry people out there, people who are angry about the government of Malaysia, angry about finance (well, that was me, but it’s borderline apathy again), angry about Prop 8. It’s not for me to criticize their anger but I am so, well not angry that it makes me wonder that in 4 years post-graduation (has it been that long?), I’ve stopped being angry and just become completely apathetic?
Apathy is bad, I think. But not being angry is also quite nice, makes it easier for me to keep focus and get things done as opposed to worry about changing things I cannot change. Or does that mean, my apathy keeps me from getting involved because I don’t believe things would change? Have I become that cynical that I do not believe in hope for the humanity? No, we can’t?
I’m confusing myself.
Philosophical and mindless thoughts exercise aside, Eizwan has finally come home! And he’s not a frozen Popsicle as everyone had suggested he might be. He brought home for me lots of goodies (hooray! I’m like a little girl who loves presents) of which includes a puffin with the Norwegian flag on it, a calendar to replace John Simm for 2009 and face wash from the Blue Lagoon. To which my brother looked at it and said, “Is he trying to suggest something?” Hey!
We ate Chillis to celebrate his homecoming and thus begun my overeating for this week. Chillis tends to do that to you, one minute you’re eating a burger, the next you’re scarfing down pisang goreng (banana fritters) and char kuey teow. Okay, not all at the same time, but in a shot time-frame. And I’ve yet to go to the gym since my head oscillates from being completely fine to the room spinning around and me falling off my chair from a dizzy spell. I think it’s a sign of an infection or some sort of funky virus those children might have carried when I was volunteering at a kindergarten concert.
And about kindies? Instant birth control! Despite the little children looking adorable running around and dancing about in their super cute outfits, I cannot help but feel very tired trying to catch up with these mini-human beings. Having said that, the instant birth control comes from the parents in kindergartens. I’m sure at one point these people were decent human beings, but having children have turned into some scary and selfish monsters. Some of them were scarily aggressive and downright mean, that it makes me wonder how on earth do you educate your children to grow up to be well-mannered and thoughtful adults? The kids emulate you and when you push small children aside to grab toys for your child, your kid will just grow up learning that it’s okay not to queue, it’s okay not to say thank you, it’s okay to shove another child off the stage to get what you want.
I think it’s offensive but then again, what can you do when a parent thinks those ARE the right values to teach their child? Being nice means being last? Courtesy is a sign of weakness and the best way forward to succeed in life is to rightly grab what is yours? Would I turn into one of those aggressive and selfish parents the moment I have a child and then assure myself, I’m not like one of them? The thought frightens me.
Anyway, enough of the rambling for this morning. It is now 10am, enough procratisnation for the day. I have to get back to work and make sure my head does not explodey in between. Ciao for now.