So in my previous entry, I tried to do something that I’ve not done in a while, write a blog entry with subtext. For some reason, about an hour after publishing the entry online, I decided that I didn’t like it at all. For some reason, I find it rather insincere and a wee bit pretentious. Or a lot pretentious, yadda, yadda, yadda.
I do feel like deleting it completely but I don’t think I should. I think its best I leave it on my blog as a reminder of what I should try and avoid doing.
This is one of the many challenges that I find in writing. I have a picture in my mind, a scene that I see and then to put that scene across is incredibly difficult. Sometimes, the words come off…well, just wrong and it doesn’t give out the feel that I want. My biggest problem is coming off as sincere as possible without sounding either pretentious…or well, angry. Or sometimes, when I’m trying to write noir, I end up sounding pretty goofy. I think sometimes despite my attempts at projecting a cynical image, I’m a pretty cheerful gal.
I was writing a “mood piece” yesterday which involved romance between two of my protagonists. I can do violence pretty okay, tension and suspense pretty well, but romance? I find it really difficult and despite tinkering with the story, I just couldn’t get the feel that I wanted for my piece and then hence, the rest of my *fingers crossed* novel. I don’t quite enjoy the way romance is portrayed in noir and hard-boiled detective novels: I find them mechanical and often times, perfunctory. The greatest challenge is pulling off a romance scene in a darker genre that is subtle and sincere, without sounding either cheesy or epic. Or naive.
I’ve finally decided the best way out of the funk that I have would be to read more poetry. Shamefully, I have something against poetry after two years of suffering in IB English. Each time we did poetry, I’d be incredibly clueless of the meaning and interpretation and then I’d just give up. And cry a little. And have this deep fear of poetry.
But it’s time to overcome it, so the very few people who read this blog (or lurkers out there), I need your help. Tell me your favourite poems and your favourite poets and why? Give me a feel for what a novice can do to attempt understanding poetry and widening my world to something a little more than just mystery and suspense novels and Doctor Who.